Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Travelling To The US, My Travelling Experience

Hi Guys,

I promised to tell you of what we experienced entering the U.S, after our Nigerian Underwear bomber messed our image abroad.
For those who don't really understand the gravity of what he has done, you need to make a trip and find out how bad it is and how his singular action, has changed the world of flying and the security risk involved with such.

From what we deduced at the airport, this is going to continue for as long as it takes, as the United States has found out that no matter how secure they seem to be, there are guys out there, who would go through all lengths to try and bring the country to its knees. They are in it for the long haul and Nigerians would be at the receiving end of the stick, as fore-runners to air traffic safety & security.

If this is happening at the airports, I can second guess what is happening at the embassies across the world, where Nigerians go to renew or apply for a visa to the United States.
Nigerians are a bunch of travelling people (more Nomadic than anything else).

London Experience:
We left for the U.K as a start, on the 28Th, 3days after the Christmas incident and plans were to do another European country, before heading out to the U.S.
Murtala Airport was a breeze, as it was business as usual and no different from what is normally experienced.
"Oga anything to declare"
"Oga, anything for the boys"

Just before boarding at the final departure hall, we were frisked (Patted down). VIP or not, you were rubbed down, shoes taken off, belts, laptops, bags searched, the works.
It was done in a very friendly and professional manner and then you were allowed to board.

On arrival at the Heathrow Airport, the captain announced that all passengers should have their passports at hand before they disembark, as airport security/customs/immigration, were at the door to check.
As we dis-embarked from the plane, as said, they were all there at the aircraft door, with the sniffer dogs and we had to queue in a single file to walk past them.
The dogs ran around in circles around you and then went on to the next passenger.

Clearing customs and immigration in London was a breeze and we were out in less than 10Min's from when we disembarked from the plane.

Plans changed and we decided to spend the New Year in London and head to the U.S on the 4Th.

U.S Experience:
Heathrow check in: At the baggage check-in counter, plenty questions, as you check in.
Whether flying 1st, business or economy, you were asked the same questions.
Then you went into passport control, body scanners and xrays for hand luggage, jackets, shoes, belts etc.
Here you are also patted down, then allowed to proceed.

Normally, when going through the final boarding, they have 2 lines for those flying business and those flying economy.
This time around, 1 line was used.
We went through the same process of taking off our belts, shoes, emptying out our bags, turning on laptops to see if they were not bombs etc.
It was a long queue and tiring process, as you were moved from 1 person to the other.
That was when my wife and I realised that we were the only blacks going to board the flight, with 228passengers, headed to Boston.
The damming part, was that we were Nigerians.

On board, people would look at us and take their faces away, when you stare back at them and if you did keep looking at them, they smiled with that look of "I know what you are planning and I'm going to stop you"!
I just had fun on board. drank as much as I could, played with the cabin crew and took to walking up and down the aisle, when I got bored of using the onboard entertainment.
The look on every ones face, was that of amusement, mixed with fear.
It was a plane filled with people returning home after holidaying in the U.K.

Arrival at Boston Logan Airport:
Got to Immigration. Hall filled with about 500+ passengers (2 Planes came in at the same time).
Immigration officer nice and chatted with us. Asked the normal questions, on what we were here for and how long we were staying.
Stamped us in.
Moving over to baggage claim, an officer walked up to us and said we should follow him.
Now the wahala started.................

There was a barrage of questions and you need to be quick with your answers.
Don't tell a lie, as this would be very counter productive.

Where are you coming from?
Do you live in the UK?
How long are you in the US for?
How long are you staying in Boston?
Where else are you visiting?
Do you have Family there?
What is the name of of your sister?
Her husband's name?
How old are you?
How old did you say you are?
How old is your sister in Houston?

(All answers written down)!

Is your sisters maiden name the same with yours?
How much do you have on you?
Is this for both of you or just you?
How much has your wife got with her?
What do you do?

To wife:
What do you do?
Where did you study?
Which University in Boston?
Which High school in Vermont?
What mountain are you both going skiing on?
How many mountains are in New Hampshire?
Where did you work in New York?

(All answers written down)

Then he goes through our wallets, bags and passports.
Leaves us and heads to a door where 2 other officers were standing:
Discussion between the 3 to which we could overhear:

What age are we looking for?
43?
Falls within that age?
Height and build?
About same?

They both walk back and one takes our passports, walks over to a computer and starts punching in data.
2nd officer comes to us and starts questioning again:

How old did you say you were?
What is your sisters date of birth

(My Sister's is a year older on the 17th of January and I would be there)

I told him same and answered just as fast as we answered all questions thrown at us.
The 2nd officer walks up to us and shook his head, stating that we were clean and cleared.

Then I asked if we were on the 5000+ watch list?
He said there was no watch list but a general list.

Goes on to tell us that this was what they were mandated to do and presidential orders were to check all Nigerians coming into the US.
I was tempted to tell him that the plane had Pakistanis, Arabs and North Africans on board.
Some really did look like terrorist!

He now interjected that we stood out.
1. Nigerians
2. Only blacks on board
3. Nigerians and only blacks (Bad combo)
4. Nigerian, Black and travelling via a trip that is similar to that taken by the suicide bomber.

We spent about 30 minutes answering questions and then a clearance slip was brought in, filled by the officer, signed and he now said he would escort us out.
I asked why and he said he could give me the slip, but I would be stopped again.
So he walked us past 2 more stations, where he nodded and showed them the slip, saw us to the final exit and waved us goodbye, stating that we should have a nice holiday.

Over the last 12 years, we have done this trip over 20 times and never been pulled over once.
It could be mind blowing when this happens and you have a problem with being interrogated.
We (Nigerians), would be worse for it, as we have a government that is basically non-existent and one that has always shown utter disregard for its citizens.
Where is your president?
Do we have a vice-president or a toothless dog, who's hands and mouth are tied
Who is running the country?
Many questions, many answers!

We would hope and pray that another suicide bomber caught or has a failed attempt, isn't from Nigeria.
This would be the final nail in the coffin for those who fly internationally, as a part of our business and lifestyle.
Its well and Nigeria Go survive.!!!

Badvibes

Monday, January 11, 2010

Hi Guys,

http://lifetimefitness.mylt.com/community/cycling/

http://lifetimefitness.mylt.com/servlet/JiveServlet/downloadImage/38-6462-3139/577-433/photohouston.jpg

(Copy and paste either URL, on a new web-page)

I was a part of this epic event, hosted by the Lifetime fitness club.
This was an attempt to have the highest number of cycles in a class, being taught and pedalling for 2 straight hours.
Weather was cold, but very sunny as the sun was out. There were industrial heaters placed all over the event center (The Hotel Sorella City Centre in Houston, Texas) and participants started arriving, as early as 10am.

I got there with my older sister and her family and we both got registered.
She had invited me earlier and truth be told, the last I rode a pedal bike for over 10mins, was over 30years ago.
2hrs? Hmmmmm !!
I just knew I could do it! I bi man and I bi proper Naija man (We no dey ever gree, until body prove otherwise).

The event had lifetime clubs from across Houston, coming together for this event and some cyclist had practiced for this, for over a year!
At 1.00pm or was it 12noon (Cant remember again, as bodi still dey pain me), we all mounted and the Life Time Fitness CEO, Bahram Akardi and his assistants, all mounted their bikes on the stage, with other trainers, moving across the venue, assisting in any way they could and the DJ pumping fast paced songs, drumming up the tempo.

President makes a speech and informs us of the ride itinerary and style.
I then knew that I was in trouble.
Local and world press around!
Guinness book of records people around!
Then the warning that if you were caught cheating or lagging behind, you would be removed from your bike and brought to the stage to ride with the team leads, made me start debating whether i made the right decision.

We kicked off by starting in the race style, with the information that we all set the resistance level to 3 (Cant explain that in small words)
This was done for 2mins, then a rest ( As in slow down and not stop pedaling) for 20 secs and then another 2 mins burst etc.
We increased to various riding styles:
Hill climbing
Trail riding
Downhill riding
Track riding
Fast pace / race riding
Standing and riding uphill with the highest resistance set
All kinds, as I can remember all styles (Brain still in remission).

In my mind, I just thought that this was different from riding a sports bike.
Here, I'm doing all the work!
I felt very sorry for myself, as I was surrounded by people, who took lifetime fitness, as fanatical as those we see praying in Mountain of Fire Church or Deeper Life!
I kept asking myself what I had gotten myself into.

After the announcement that we had done 30mins of pedaling, my inner mind, started calculating how I would survive the remaining 90mins, in front of all the cameras and participants, who made you look foolish and very unfit, if you dont follow instructions of slow down to rest.
Adjacent to me, was this couple, who made it look like they were having great fun! (It was great fun and fanfare, but .......)
Ol Boy', They were having fun and the wife was racing the husband all through each cycle.
In my mind, I was blaming myself for the Okazi and Eba, I ate 8 hours before and the Double Cheese and Beef McDonald's burger + Fries + Extra Large Coke, I had an hour before.

My sister sat on the cycle next to me (she is also a health fanatic), kept saying that, "You are in a world record making event and you are representing Nigeria, so do it!"
I just kept asking myself, "Na who send me"?
"Se' Naija Government know say I dey do this kin thing"?
"If anything happen now, Naija government go say, dem no know me and dem no send me message"!
Dem go say, "There are no records of such a person in our data base and he must have obtained his passport illegally"
"Some go even talk say, na too much money dey do me, see as he don get heart attack on top bicycle"!

Similarly, i thought of what guys at the biking clubs would say!
D2M2 "??????"
Fotodadi "?????"
Justice "?????"
WHY "?????"
BSK "????"
Blink "?????"
Orags "??????"
Diseye "??????"
IB "?????"
Papel "?????"
And of course Inyang "???????"

With this, determination set in, I cycled and pedaled and cycled and pedaled and.....................
90 minutes gone and with only 30 left to go, I started my self re-evaluation again!
Should I, or should I not quit?
Questions, running through my mind.
They say that the fear of Yabis from Mugumailers, is the beginning of wisdom, so I continued to follow directions from the CEO of Lifetime Fitness (Though halfheartedly).
Then Femi Kuti's song set it; Him just dey go, go go, just dey go!

I also asked myself, if the organizers had known that I was actually a Nigerian, would they have allowed me to participate?
Would they have allowed me and then call the bomb or anti-terrorist squad, to watch me from all angles and shoot me, if I make any sudden movements?
I also feared that, if something had gone wrong there and they were looking for the "USUAL" suspects, would I have been fingered and arrested?
The pains of carrying a Naija passport and the stigma being carried on all of us! Na wa!

10 minutes to go, power failing like NEPA (Abi PHCN), then they started passing all kinds of power enhancing drinks, (Cold, Hot, Different colors of funning looking and tasting jello-like substance), I then knew that I would complete this and call all my detractors to shame (D2M2)!

Summarizing, I would say, I'm proud to be one of the 1000+ cycle rs that took part in the event.
I completed the full course!
Been There, Done that and have the T-Shirt to show for it! (I do have the T-Shirt given. Remember I said we all wore the same outfits)
I also represented Naija! (Though Un-Officially - Afamako stylee)
My Sis and I were the ONLY NIGERIAN's that took part, but not the only blacks!
I now realise how unfit I am and would need to add that (Fitness & Gym) to my 2010 resolution and "To Do" List.

This was in all the local news in Houston and we are waiting the pictures and videos to come out.
The URL attached, is the picture taken by NASA and shows what it looked like from space.
This is sent, towards getting all your minds away from the maddening issue of what is presently going on in Naija, even if its for the time it took you to read this write-up.

Being a Nigerian isn't a bad thing after all.

Badvibes

http://lifetimefitness.mylt.com/community/cycling/

http://lifetimefitness.mylt.com/servlet/JiveServlet/downloadImage/38-6462-3139/577-433/photohouston.jpg



...............We have obtained the first exclusive arial photo of the World's Largest Cycling Event hosted by Life Time Fitness City Centre in Houston on Saturday. Look for a full recap of the event to be posted soon. Rumor is this event was so large it was actually visible from outer space. We'll confirm with NASA.








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Wednesday, October 21, 2009

I Love Naija

I have come to the realization that a lot of people know so little of their home country Nigeria, so today I have put together some salient ‘need to know points’ so this is an opportunity to reaffirm what you know and increase your knowledge of what was called ‘General knowledge’ when we were in school!·

Total landmass - approximately 923,768 square kilometres (356,669 sq. miles),· Location - West Africa, 10° North and 8° East, bound by Niger in the north, Chad in the northeast, Cameroon in the east, Republic of Benin in the west, and the Atlantic Ocean in the south.·

Climate - Tropical, arid in north mean maximum temperatures of 30°C - 32°C (south) and 33°C - 35°C (north).· Sub regions - The country is divided into 36 states and a Federal Capital Territory, Abuja.·

Population - Nigeria is the most populous country in Africa with a population of over 120 million and estimated at about 132 million in 2006. (just looking at Lagos I am not surprised).· And it is growing at a rate of 2.4%!· Lagos State accounts for about 15 million people (see?... I told you!... Eko for show! Eko o ni baje!)· Other rapidly growing cities in Nigeria are Port Harcourt, Kano, Kaduna, Aba, Onitsha and Abuja, the Federal Capital Territory.·

Urbanisation - 57% of Nigeria’s population resides in the rural areas (fancy that!)· Poverty - 60% of Nigerians live under the poverty line (that’s less than $1 a day! what percentage are all the rich folks in VGC, Ikoyi, Femi Okunnu Estate, Lekki and Ikeja GRA…. And all the hummer and IVTEC driving peeps?)·

Unemployment – 5.8% of Nigerians are unemployed (I bet its way more than that… I bet someone got the decimal points wrong and its 58 or something… just kidding!)· Labour force – 48.99million people make up the Nigerian labour force (see what I said about the unemployment figures, will 40 million people be toiling away and the economy still be this crazy?...I think so!)·

Ethnic Groups - There are over than 250 ethnic groups; the following are the most populous and politically influential: Hausa and Fulani 29%, Yoruba 21%, Igbo (Ibo) 18%, Ijaw 10%, Kanuri 4%, Ibibio 3.5%, Tiv 2.5%· Literacy - 68% of Nigerians are literate (not bad Not bad!)· Median Age - 55% of Nigerians are between the ages of 15 & 64 (no wonder our system is so totally juvenile!)·

Life Expectancy – this is 47.66% for women and 46.52 for the men! (so ladies be nice to the fellas they are likely to die before you do!)· HIV/AIDS Prevalence - 3.4million people are living with HIV/AIDS (whao! You just can’t go spreading the love you know, one has to spread it carefully! real carefully! :-))·

Prevalent Diseases – Malaria, Typhoid Fever, Hepatitis A, bacterial & protozoan diarrhea and meningococcal meningitis (whao! You can’t even go spreading the hug sef… with meningococcal meningitis and hepatitis A floating around - even their names sound deadly!)· The legal system - based on English common law, Islamic law (in 12 northern states), and traditional law·

The legislative system – the National Assembly is bicameral and consists of Senate -109 seats (3 from each state plus 1 from Abuja) and House of Representatives - 360 seats; members are elected by popular vote to serve four-year terms.

There will be more information for you to digest soon!My sources are: The Economic Intelligence Unit Report on Nigeria 2006 CIA World Fact Book
posted by Tyger at 06:13 on 18-Apr-2007

badvibes said...
Hi Tyger, your nickname or petname depicts Leo, but your zodiac says Taurus. So i guess its a Petname.You gave an update, which can be seen on the EFCC website (If one cares to check), with your comments on Naija.

I was expecting to see comments on why you really love Naija. For me, Naija is a unique society, filled with unique people, who are very dynamic in all ramifications. I have been to different countries, cultures and climates and believe you me, Naija can not be immitated (Like the fakes from China).

I would talk about some aspects to be brief, as Naija jist plenti well, well !! Using our educational system, its rife with all kinds of scams that you can actually get a Bsc, Msc and MBA, without visiting the 4 walls of a university.

Please dont assume that I am speaking of online education or distance learning, I'm speaking of what we call "Sorting"!. I.e sorting out school administrators, Professors etc. This has gone on for so long, that we are now getting the brunt of our poor educational system, when we apply for international placements in international schools.

Funny thing about this though, When we eventually get to the new school, we always excel. Across the American, British and Canadian Continent, Universities, Hospitals, Manufacturing, Oil & Gas, Telecommunications, Entertainment, Tourism industries etc, all have Nigerians in leadership positions. This gives you an idea on the dynamism of the Nigerian race (Please dont confuse as the Blackman race, but Nigerian Race).

In crime, we are outstanding, in fraud, we are leaders (Talk to the South African Government, Nigerians are terrorising the Country in both the illicit drug and armed robbery business). kidnapping, We are outstanding. learn from the Niger delta militants, that have successfully negotiated with countries for the release of its citizens and got paid, without the Federal Govt lifting a finger.

They even advertise thier exploits in the national newspapers. Our police? The best in the world. its only in Naija that a Policeman can have 2 wives and 10 children and send all 10 children to school, up to the University level, whilst earning N7,000 a month. 7K Naira I say!! This is about $53 USD per month. Can you beat that? They work 24hours a day, come rain or sunshine and they are able to shoot thier 30year old civil war regulated rifles and yet keep the crime rate in Nigeria down! We should give them an award for bravery.

Yesterday, we heard of the bloodshed at Virgina Tech University. 33 dead! can that happen in Nigeria? NO! we discussed this at work, as we saw it unfold, and i told my colleagues that if that was a Nigerian University, It wouldnt have been that bad. maybe 2 or 3 dead at the max. We are so used to the fear of stray bullets that once we hear the sound of a gunshot, we run to the nearest hole. Most people that died, were those who thought they were watching an action movie and moved closer for a better view.

Did you hear of any Naija man die at the World Trade Center bombings? Did you see the documentary on the bombings? The "Oyinbo's" moved towards the buildings to get a closer view, whilst the "Blackman" took to his/her heels. It is inherently bottled in our DNA to flee danger. Naija is the only place where i drive the streets and see "Purewater" nylons and trash all over the place.

It was the 1 way of knowing i was back home after being away for months. Naija is where you can drive "Oneway" on Ikorudu road, 3rd mainaland and anywhere, and nobody would ask if you needed psychiatric evaluation.

Naija, where you can tell a policeman that he is mad and that you would get him fired for his effontary for asking you for your "Particulars" and he tells you that he is sorry, begging you to forgive him. Try that with the British Met Police or Texan redneck Corps? Naija, where you can drive without a drivers license (Ask our chinese and indian visitors? Who gave them a Nigerian drivers license) Where is FRSC and what are they doing about this?

Naija where my friend, who is half Danish/Half Lebanese, has a Nigerian passport! He isnt even married to a Nigerian, wasnt born here or affiliated to anything Nigerian! Na wa for Nigerian Immigration Unit!

Its only here we can evade taxes, live very well above our means, without anyone raising eyebrows. Live in a 1 bedroom "face-me-i-face-u apartment and drive a 2007 Infinity QX56 plus a 2007 BMW 750il. Where is FIRS?Can we talk about NEPA, Water Corporation, LATSMA, Area Boys, EFCC, Federal and State Roads, Airline industry?
That na Plenti, Plenti jist!
Can we talk about the last elections, the next one, INEC, Judiciary, Senate, OBJ and Atiku?Still plenti Jist!

Can we talk about the night life (Sanusi fafunwa, Opebi, Allen, Surulere), The clubs (Ynot, Cubes, The Longe, Saipan, Thistle, Londoner Bacchus, 11.45, Planet 44, Bungalow etc), Joints (Iya Peju Pepersoup Yaba, Yakoyo Agege, Stadium, Maureens kitchen, Abe igi Obalende, Whitehouse, Iya Modina, Bank-Olemo Designer Rice, Obalende Suya etc),
Hang-outs (Sweet Sensation, Mr Biggs, Tantalizers, St Elmos, Bacelos, Tastee Fried Chicken, Chicken Republic, etc),
Beaches (Eleko, Takwa Bay, Lekki, Alpha, La Campaigne Tropicana, Eko Tourist, Badagry Beach, etc),
Resorts (Obudu Cattle Ranch, Ikogosi Warm Springs, Abraka Turf Club, Abraka Holiday Resort, Olumo Rock, Yankari Game Reserves, Bauchi Reserve Park, Osun River Shrine, etc) , Arts and craft (Eyo Festival, Sokoto Durbar etc, Traditions (Oro Festival), Malls, Cinemas (Across the Nation, Lagos X 3, Abuja, Tinapa) and numerous everyday Lagbo-lagbo and Owambe parties, Comedy central Canivals, Nollywood + its stars, gossip + much more? Jist go tire u!All these and many, many more points, makes Naija such an interesting and endearing place to live and work in.

There are a lot more points of discussion not noted in this blog, but available. The bottom line is that, no matter where you go to, or how long or short you have been away from the shores of Naija, you would always miss home. I love my contry, i no go lie.
So Tyger, maybe, you should write more about your experiencies in Nigeria. This way, we would all know how much you love your country.I LOVE NAIJA OOOO !!! I NO LIE!
19 April 2007 08:09